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What are You Doing Here? May 31, 2007

Posted by psimitar in abilene, austin, drama.
1 comment so far

psychic defense on It seems that my blogging tendencies are highest at the beginning of every one of my new endeavors and this one is no different. This time there’s even a move and a new job involved.

First of all, the move and a little intro. I’m a 25 year old, openly gay male who came out of the closet in 2002 in Austin, TX. Austin represents many things for me. When I think of Austin I think of freedom. Growing up in Fort Worth, a somewhat sprawling and conservative sister-city to Dallas, TX, I thought if I could just get to Austin for college in 1999 something fantastic would happen for me. Little did I know the fantastic thing I was hoping for was an environment where I could feel comfortable expressing my sexuality.

It took me nearly two years to reach that point, but afterwards my adult life truly began. My relationships began to take on more meaning as my self-honesty rose. I felt more at ease in my own skin for the first time since those early teen years. Some relationships that I had before coming out of the closet suffered with my change in world-view, but I still have no regrets. I look at it this way: This is who I really am and if there’s a problem with that, let’s talk about it but in no way will I go back in the closet to maintain a relationship. All of this is to say that a major portion of my personality was cultivated, tested and tempered in the Austin ecosystem.

Yes, I’ve taken extended leaves, such as my 2001-2002 ten month adventure to Japan. A three-month post graduation career move to Abilene helped land me a professional job back on UT Campus in Austin in August of 2004, at which I stayed at until I exhausted all of my interest in 2006 at exactly the two-year period. Hell, I even fell in love with that German exchange student one line down. One could say I always seem to reset to Austin.

Benjamin

I’m back in Abilene now on another career initiative. I miss Austin terribly but a combination of factors, some self imposed and others not, make conditions there unacceptable for me. I’d like to discuss some of these factors at a later date for therapeutic reasons, but for now it’s comforting enough to admit them as a blanket-statement.

Abilene represents surprised opportunity for me now. A new job opened up at a Nexstar Broadcasting affiliate here for a New Media Account Executive, or a website salesman. It took me a bit to put 2 and 2 together to see the obvious fit. I spent the last year after quiting my UT administrative job studying Media: where it’s been, what it’s doing and ultimately where it’s going. I would describe myself nominally as a creative person with an interest in producing new media.

my 2004 podcastMy 2004 podcast project AustinExhaustion, for example, would be something I would love to work on with a team covering all sorts of topics from local news, celebrity bullshit and TV/Movies. But I would be remiss if I didn’t mention here that AustinExhaustion was…well, exhausting! I look at my new sales position at BigCountryHomePage.com to be an opportunity to expand my skill-set in New Media. I’m going to learn how to sell something that recently had no real value at all.

So to wrap this all up, What am I doing here?

Me! I hope to make this place a little more interesting because I know I can only take so much of myself and anyone reading this will be able to take a whole lot less!

C’ya.